Life contains things we have some control over and other things that just happen to us.
The latter are typically dramatic like heart attacks, meeting someone, car accidents, losing a job, illness or loss of a loved one – and have profound effects. They force (unwanted and unprepared) change on us.
Some of these external threats can be planned for. We know that In tornado prone states in America some residents plan for disaster and create underground bunkers in anticipation. Yet it is not so easy to plan for and avoid flash floods after ten years of drought, or being in a plane when an engine explodes. If we have a disaster later in life, we often don’t have time on our side and we’re not as resilient as we were in our 30s and 40s.
The truth is we never actually know what ‘might happen’. We can provide contingency plans and insurance to some degree, but we can’t plan for, cover and avoid everything
There are two points here: the things you can (partly) plan for, insure and protect against – by wills, guardianship, organ donation certificates, insurance policies, emergency supplies and underground bunkers. But there are also things you can’t. You may (only) be able to imagine them and allow for them in your thinking and anticipation.
We suggest you at least draw up a plan of the “what ifs” and threats that might reasonably happen to you. At least check that your will, insurance covers, and as far as possible financial provisions are reviewed regularly and are up to date. Perhaps you might also draft a table of possible contingencies you might have to face. Which ones are you completely unprepared for? Which ones do you think will never happen to you? Are you sure?
How you handle the things that happen that you can’t stop and can’t change is one of the great challenges of life, and of older age. Being older can make you vulnerable in new ways and bring threats to your comfortable, settled life.
Part of your life plan involves recognition of changes in your lives – those that can reasonably be anticipated, and those that, if they happen, will be a terrible shock. Are your resources and defences – emotional, relational, financial, and physical – in good shape IF the unexpected happens?
